~Why are hemorrhoids called hemorrhoids and asteroids called asteroids? Wouldn't it make more sense if it was the other way around? But, if that was true, then a proctologist would be an astronaut~ Robert Schimmel
Even though I'm on an approved leave from work, I still set my alarm clock for 7:00 in the morning and I still treat the weekdays as work days except I'm working on myself instead of in a cubicle. I usually don't go out on the weekdays. I save that for the weekends, so I still get excited for Fridays. I haven't done as well getting up at exactly 7:00 like I used to at The House. I've been sleeping in a bit and taking naps which I admit is the luxury of not being at work, but overall, I've spent longer hours working on myself than the usual forty hours a week at my job. It's been a lot of work dealing with me and that's why I put it off for so long because I knew it would take a lot of effort to fix everything.
I think I hit snooze this morning for 5 hours which is a record for me. Usually, I hit it for just an hour. Blogger went down at about midnight last night, so I went to bed. I posted Day 67 this morning when my alarm went off at 7:00 and then, I fell back asleep. When I woke up again, I couldn't believe that my clock said noon. I felt like I had only snoozed for my usual hour. My new way to deal with anger and other uncomfortable feelings must be to sleep it away rather than drink it away. It has the same numbing effect. I could have slept until my AA meeting at 7:30 tonight, but luckily, I have a roommate that works from home and he suggested that we go out for lunch. His girlfriend owns the best sandwich shop in town called The Simple Sandwich. It's located Downtown and we live near Uptown, so it was a good chance to get out of the house.
Yesterday morning, I managed to wake up at 8:00 after hitting snooze for an hour to go see my favorite Assman; my proctologist. Assman is from one of my favorite Seinfeld episodes. Anyway, I was going in for my first of five Infrared Coagulation (IRC) treatment. IRC is a non-surgical way to treat hemorrhoids. The procedure is done by placing a small probe above the 'rhoid which emits a few short bursts of infrared light. This energy coagulates the blood vessels that feed the 'rhoid, which causes them to shrivel in a few weeks. Pretty sexy stuff! The nurse came in and gave me a preview of what to expect. She mentioned that it may feel like cigarette burns in some spots. Whaaaat?! They didn't mention that before. I was only expecting red laser beam pointers with no pain! She said that I may experience urges to go to the bathroom afterwards due to the butt spasms, but that it would only be temporary. Ugh!
As I lay on the table waiting for the Assman, I tried concentrating on my secret, safe place that I had created during inpatient treatment. However, I became more interested in listening to the conversation he was having about liposuction with the lady in the next room, so I eavesdropped. When the Assman finally walked in, he was the same nice, energetic doctor and after some small talk, he told me to get into the Cindy Crawford model pose. I gave him the courtesy chuckle again. He got the laser beam out and "ouch!" I exclaimed. It was exactly like a cigarette burn on the delicate parts of my bum as the nurse had explained. The pain only lasted a few seconds after each blast. Although, I could hear the subtle click of the laser beam and I'd wince while waiting a second for the burning sensation to begin. The whole procedure lasted just a few minutes with about 6 clicks. I felt a little pain down there and it took more time to sit up and get dressed. I felt pressure to poop, but tried ignoring it. Instead, I focused on all the things I had to do yesterday while my butt was spazzing out.
The nurse had warned about bleeding after bowel movements and instructed me to take 2 stool softeners during the day and 2 in the evening while I'm receiving treatments, so basically, I need to take these for the next 3 months. She told me to buy the economy size, so I went to Target since I don't have Costco membership. As I stood staring at all the options, an old man walked by and said to me, "Big decision!" I already felt embarrassed enough to be in that aisle, so I just looked blankly at him as he walked passed me. Unfortunately, they only carried laxatives with stool softener and stool softener with laxatives, so I selected the latter thinking that it had more stool softener than pooping power. After lunch with my roommate, he offered to help me scour the city for stool softener sans laxatives, but I declined. I kind of like pooping.
I'm sitting at a coffee shop waiting for my tire to be replaced after it was flattened by a gianormous pothole on Highway 94 a few nights ago. It's freezing out todayI The temp is -2, but according to Weather.com and me, it feels like -17 or colder. Instead of waiting at the car shop, I froze walking 6 blocks to the local coffee shop that serves vanilla lattes using real vanilla beans instead of walking a block away to a coffee shop chain. I've become a bit of a coffee snob now that I can no longer be a wine and beer snob. I admire baristas who can make beautiful latte art such as rosettes with intricate weaving or hearts. They pour the steam milk like it's a paint brush and create these lovely patterns or designs. Little touches like these make me happy now.
I also feel less debbie downerish than last night. Thank God for friends. I love them. They make me laugh and that's definitely the best medicine. I'm meeting a friend at an AA meeting later tonight and afterwards, we're going out to dinner. I will receive my 60 day medallion or rather, poker chip with sticker on it, so I'm glad that I did not drink the other night. I know for sure that if I started drinking wine, I wouldn't be able to stop. I'd be powerless. I'm glad that I woke up this morning with nothing to regret.
Even though I'm on an approved leave from work, I still set my alarm clock for 7:00 in the morning and I still treat the weekdays as work days except I'm working on myself instead of in a cubicle. I usually don't go out on the weekdays. I save that for the weekends, so I still get excited for Fridays. I haven't done as well getting up at exactly 7:00 like I used to at The House. I've been sleeping in a bit and taking naps which I admit is the luxury of not being at work, but overall, I've spent longer hours working on myself than the usual forty hours a week at my job. It's been a lot of work dealing with me and that's why I put it off for so long because I knew it would take a lot of effort to fix everything.
I think I hit snooze this morning for 5 hours which is a record for me. Usually, I hit it for just an hour. Blogger went down at about midnight last night, so I went to bed. I posted Day 67 this morning when my alarm went off at 7:00 and then, I fell back asleep. When I woke up again, I couldn't believe that my clock said noon. I felt like I had only snoozed for my usual hour. My new way to deal with anger and other uncomfortable feelings must be to sleep it away rather than drink it away. It has the same numbing effect. I could have slept until my AA meeting at 7:30 tonight, but luckily, I have a roommate that works from home and he suggested that we go out for lunch. His girlfriend owns the best sandwich shop in town called The Simple Sandwich. It's located Downtown and we live near Uptown, so it was a good chance to get out of the house.
Yesterday morning, I managed to wake up at 8:00 after hitting snooze for an hour to go see my favorite Assman; my proctologist. Assman is from one of my favorite Seinfeld episodes. Anyway, I was going in for my first of five Infrared Coagulation (IRC) treatment. IRC is a non-surgical way to treat hemorrhoids. The procedure is done by placing a small probe above the 'rhoid which emits a few short bursts of infrared light. This energy coagulates the blood vessels that feed the 'rhoid, which causes them to shrivel in a few weeks. Pretty sexy stuff! The nurse came in and gave me a preview of what to expect. She mentioned that it may feel like cigarette burns in some spots. Whaaaat?! They didn't mention that before. I was only expecting red laser beam pointers with no pain! She said that I may experience urges to go to the bathroom afterwards due to the butt spasms, but that it would only be temporary. Ugh!
As I lay on the table waiting for the Assman, I tried concentrating on my secret, safe place that I had created during inpatient treatment. However, I became more interested in listening to the conversation he was having about liposuction with the lady in the next room, so I eavesdropped. When the Assman finally walked in, he was the same nice, energetic doctor and after some small talk, he told me to get into the Cindy Crawford model pose. I gave him the courtesy chuckle again. He got the laser beam out and "ouch!" I exclaimed. It was exactly like a cigarette burn on the delicate parts of my bum as the nurse had explained. The pain only lasted a few seconds after each blast. Although, I could hear the subtle click of the laser beam and I'd wince while waiting a second for the burning sensation to begin. The whole procedure lasted just a few minutes with about 6 clicks. I felt a little pain down there and it took more time to sit up and get dressed. I felt pressure to poop, but tried ignoring it. Instead, I focused on all the things I had to do yesterday while my butt was spazzing out.
The nurse had warned about bleeding after bowel movements and instructed me to take 2 stool softeners during the day and 2 in the evening while I'm receiving treatments, so basically, I need to take these for the next 3 months. She told me to buy the economy size, so I went to Target since I don't have Costco membership. As I stood staring at all the options, an old man walked by and said to me, "Big decision!" I already felt embarrassed enough to be in that aisle, so I just looked blankly at him as he walked passed me. Unfortunately, they only carried laxatives with stool softener and stool softener with laxatives, so I selected the latter thinking that it had more stool softener than pooping power. After lunch with my roommate, he offered to help me scour the city for stool softener sans laxatives, but I declined. I kind of like pooping.
I'm sitting at a coffee shop waiting for my tire to be replaced after it was flattened by a gianormous pothole on Highway 94 a few nights ago. It's freezing out todayI The temp is -2, but according to Weather.com and me, it feels like -17 or colder. Instead of waiting at the car shop, I froze walking 6 blocks to the local coffee shop that serves vanilla lattes using real vanilla beans instead of walking a block away to a coffee shop chain. I've become a bit of a coffee snob now that I can no longer be a wine and beer snob. I admire baristas who can make beautiful latte art such as rosettes with intricate weaving or hearts. They pour the steam milk like it's a paint brush and create these lovely patterns or designs. Little touches like these make me happy now.
I also feel less debbie downerish than last night. Thank God for friends. I love them. They make me laugh and that's definitely the best medicine. I'm meeting a friend at an AA meeting later tonight and afterwards, we're going out to dinner. I will receive my 60 day medallion or rather, poker chip with sticker on it, so I'm glad that I did not drink the other night. I know for sure that if I started drinking wine, I wouldn't be able to stop. I'd be powerless. I'm glad that I woke up this morning with nothing to regret.
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