Day 112: Home (3.6.11)

~The purpose of separation of church and state is to keep forever from these shores the ceaseless strife that has soaked the soil of Europe with blood for centuries~ James Madison

I started attending my church while in rehab, so it's been about 4 months now.  Last Sunday, a 5 minute video solidified my decision that I had found my church home after halfheartedly looking on and off for many years.  A guy with one of the smoothest voices sang live while a video played showing faces of some brave adults and kids from the congregation who had suffered from emotional, physical and sexual abuse.  Some had also struggled with drug addiction, some had been cutters, some felt alone and some had eating disorders.  

Of course, I sloppily teared up.  I had gotten to know some of the people from the congregation who accepted and welcomed me, but I appreciated the church leadership recognizing real people with painful struggles, too.  I felt that I had finally found a church where I could be myself and not have to project an aura of perfection.  I enjoy going each week to learn more about God and positively fill and refresh my spirit.  I don't feel better than anyone else.  I just go for myself and to re-energize while worshiping with other Christians.  During my addiction, I was usually too tired, hungover, busy, not in the mood, but now I like going as is; angry, sad, happy, hurt, calm, scared, etc.  It's always a blessing to be able to live in a country where you can choose to not worship or worship however you choose.