~Language... has created the word "loneliness" to express the pain of being alone. And it has created the word "solitude" to express the glory of being alone~ Paul Tillich
I feel emotionally vulnerable at times on the drive to therapy as I think about what I want to talk about or what we may talk about. I was sitting at a stoplight near Lake Calhoun and across the street, I saw the perfect looking family waiting to cross. It was like a Ralph Lauren ad mocking my pathetic life. He had longer, blondish brown, messy hair. She had long, straight, dark brown hair. They were both tall, thin and gorgeous. Their chubby-cheeked baby wore an adorable newsboy hat. Her hands were on the baby stroller. His hand was wrapped around her shoulder while the other hand held the leash of the their beautiful black lab. He pulled her closer and gave her a kiss on the head as she rested it on his shoulder. It was sickeningly sweet and I teared up. That's what I had envisioned for my life.
After therapy, I was still feeling bummed about life and drove around listening to music. I felt alone and lonely as I was surrounded by people. Do you ever feel that way in your car, in your home with a significant other or family, in a city of hundreds, thousands, millions, in a world of billions? It's easy to feel insignificant among all these people; unworthy, undeserving, unfixable, unloveable. If you feel this way, too, then I guess, we're not alone.
I feel emotionally vulnerable at times on the drive to therapy as I think about what I want to talk about or what we may talk about. I was sitting at a stoplight near Lake Calhoun and across the street, I saw the perfect looking family waiting to cross. It was like a Ralph Lauren ad mocking my pathetic life. He had longer, blondish brown, messy hair. She had long, straight, dark brown hair. They were both tall, thin and gorgeous. Their chubby-cheeked baby wore an adorable newsboy hat. Her hands were on the baby stroller. His hand was wrapped around her shoulder while the other hand held the leash of the their beautiful black lab. He pulled her closer and gave her a kiss on the head as she rested it on his shoulder. It was sickeningly sweet and I teared up. That's what I had envisioned for my life.
After therapy, I was still feeling bummed about life and drove around listening to music. I felt alone and lonely as I was surrounded by people. Do you ever feel that way in your car, in your home with a significant other or family, in a city of hundreds, thousands, millions, in a world of billions? It's easy to feel insignificant among all these people; unworthy, undeserving, unfixable, unloveable. If you feel this way, too, then I guess, we're not alone.
1 comment:
I often feel this way and wonder...what is MY purpose...then I need to remember the good and positive things in my life. It's never as perfect as it looks.
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